Credits to Xue, this is music slash all-about-you game that you normally find on those annoying Friendster Bulletin boards but it has just the right twist to make me interested.
Well, first get out your trusty music player, put it on shuffle, then press next as you look at the next questions. Easy enough?? Here we go.
How are you feeling today?
~ Mario Barrett - How Do I Breathe
"How do I breathe without you here by my side,
How will I see when your love brought me to the light,
Where do I go when your heart's where I lay my head,
When you're not beneath how do I breath, how do I breathe..."
Hmpf. Same old, same old. I fasted today to pay back the days I didn't during Ramadhan. Suddenly our dining table was filled with so much food that I had to control myself from stuffing everything down my throat with all the goodies. Really. You can't imagine the amount of restraint I had to tamp down.
There was fried macaroni and wadeh from next door as well as briyani and its trimmings that Mom kept in the fridge two days ago. Mom herself cooked extra Brown Rice mixed with Cargo Rice just in case there wasn't enough. Plus, she squeezed just enough time to fry up some Epok-epoks and Roti Boyan that Nanny sent our way. We managed to bake a batch of White Chocolate Brownies during the day in between watching Discovery Travel & Living.
How to breathe like that??
Will you get far in life?
~ Take That - Butterfly
"Break free, let go...
Butterfly, fly...fly away from here,
I know we'll try (try) through the laughter and the tears
You'll always be a part of me
In my heart you'll always be
Butterfly fly...fly away, fly away..."
Yeah, I know butterflies fly far, far away from here when they break free from their cocoon. Although I don't think the same rule apply to rebellious students who just REFUSE to concentrate, hope always springs eternal. And yes, goddamit I WANT to get far in life. Just give me a few minutes to finish this first, okay?? And then I'll finish up on my essay. I PROMISE!!
How do your friends see you?
~ Captain Lee Shang - I'll Make A Man Out Of You
"(Be a man) We must be swift as the coursing river,
(Be a man) With all the force of a great typhoon,
(Be a man) With all the strength of a raging fire,
Mysterious as the dark side of the moon..."
Hur hur. This is a track from Disney's Mulan. One of the cartoons I love because Mulan is SUCH an intelligent rebel. She's my kinda gal. Now, the track is taken off during the Chinese Army's prepartions for war and singing it is their commanding officer, Captain Lee Shang. It features my favorite scenes from the movie because it turns these soldiers from zeroes to almost-heroes. This is a song about not giving up and pushing yourself through and through.
I mean, come on. Mulan is a female stuck in an all-male zone pulsing with testosterone. Although my friends don't really want to make a man out of me, it is fair to say that I do have SOME masculine qualities about me that even my friends won't disagree. Not that they see me as a man, of course. Right, guys??
I seriously think the SAF should make this their theme song instead of all those nonsense they've been sprouting with over the years. This song is SO apt for Army life. Be a man!! Do the right thing!! Doesn't apply to me, but hey, I'm just going along with the shuffle list.
Will you get married?
~ Boys Like Girls - On Top Of The World
"Let's spend tonight on top of the world,
We can do anything, we can be anything
I'll meet you tonight on top of the world,
As real as it seems
You're only in my dreams..."
And when I do, this will be how I'll be feeling. On top of the effin' world. Unlike the song, it wouldn't be a dream, of course. It's the most wonderful feeling in the universe. In my opinion. It's like, the happiest day of a person's life. I've been imagining my own wedding since I was like, six. My hubby-to-be was a Ken doll, my bridesmaid was Barbie. Hey, in my world Barbie doesn't get Ken, okay?? So why the heck would I not want to get married??
In case you haven't noticed the list on the right column, I still want my 8 kids. The silent biological clock has just started ticking and I don't think it's going to want to stop anytime soon. Just saying.
What is your life's theme song?
~ Claude Kelly - The Better Off I'll Be
"I don't recognize your voice at all,
You could be right next to me
But I swear that it seems
We're separated by a brick wall..."
"Maybe it's my fault but no I could've done better
I saw this look in your eyes a long time ago
What about you
You were so caught up trying to be a trendsetter..."
"Just pick up the pieces and walk away
Go get the keys and just drive away
Just cruise down the lonely road
See I'll be better off when you're gone..."
"The less of you I see,
The better off I'll be..."
*raises eyebrows and shakes head*
Emo or not?? Actually, there is truth in this irony. Which is kinda complicated to explain because you need to experience it to understand it. Some things are just not necesaary in life and I guess sometimes, you're much better off without it than with it. There is no right or wrong in this. It's a matter of how you handle it. The lyrics in this song have a touch of cheese in it but don't get me wrong. This is not some boyband song.
It's a slow jam song, but not a boyband ballad. I guess the message Claude Kelly is trying to sing across is that if there is nothing left to do with this curmudgeon of a problem you always seem to have, it's easier to just walk away from it all rather than try to right it. Sometimes righting it would just make things worse.
I guess it's because of these obstacles that push us to do better and thus molding us into a better person. We emerge from this stronger that we could ever think possible.
So let sleeping dogs die. Because sometimes it just might not be worth fighting for. The more I listen to this song, the more I'm convinced that this could make a great theme song for my life. Whaddya know. Go figure.
What is the story of your life?
~ Westlife - Close
"You give me strength
You give me hope
You give me someone to love, someone to hold
When I'm in your arms, I need you to know
I've never been, never been
This close..."
"Close enough to see it's true
Close enough to trust in you
Closer now than any words can say, yeah..."
My life story involves the people around me that I keep close. Of course, mostly that involves the sometimes irrational but always-knows-best mother, the financial-supplying father, the erratically-emotional sidekick sister and the rest of the little growing monsters.
To me, everyday is like a story of my life. There is something to be said of adding bits and pieces of experiences that one day, are enough to be compiled into a book. This said book is of course, the book of your life. It goes by the common name of a journal or diary.
It would be unfair to single out just one story of my life because I feel each and every memory I have as a keepsake of what I go through in life like a discovered treasure.
If I were to write a book on my life story, every chapter would feature the ones who mean so much to me.
What was high school like?
~ 5ive - Keep On Movin'
"Feels like I should be screaming
Trying to get it through to my friends
Sometimes it feels like life has no meaning
But I know things will be alright in the end..."
"Get on up when you're down
Baby, take a better look around
I know it's not much, but it's okay
We'll keep on moving anyway..."
It was half shit and half of what was to be the best days of my life.
It was hell one day and paradise the next.
It was suicidal one moment and gratifying in another.
Not my best years, but it sure beats primary school days by ten thousand miles and a half. It wasn't in an instant, though. I learned that I couldn't get along with most Malays because I was English-speaking and because I couldn't keep my mouth shut. I had an opinion on EVERYTHING. I was so outspoken and different, I was a pariah amongst some classmates. It was only in Sec 3 that I finally learnt the meaning of true friendship.
Hence, the birth of The Old Gang. Pretty cool, we thought we were. Just because we were in the fucking Drama Club.
*snerk*
Who woulda thunk it.
How can you get ahead in life?
~ Elliott Yamin - Find A Way
"The life we live, for some, is easy
And most of us just make it by
My mother works to hard to feed me
It's a wonder, how she never lost her mind
The rain is falling from the sky
It's getting harder to stay dry
They say that pride goes before a fall
Heaven, help us all
If love don't find a way..."
How to get ahead in life, you say?? Stick to your principals, never forget your roots and where you come from. I happen to think it's all in the mind and the concept of just being yourself. There is no reason to put up airs and go all pretentious just because you want people to see what you THINK they will see.
Competition is a formality of pushing yourself further than you know. It's just how the bar is being raised and how you are going to meet it.
Well, what did you want me to say?? To get ahead in life, step on everybody's toes and steamroll your way ahead uncaring of who you hurt in the process because the only thing in your shallow mind is to be a step in front of everybody else and reap the rewards life brings??
Yeah, right. Go do that then, that is if you have nobody around you and you're all alone in this world.
What is tomorrow going to be like?
~ Lifehouse - Easier To Be
"Fell off the world
Fell from my feet
Give up on myself
You didn't give up on me
Let myself go
You were still there
Like coming home
Coming up for air ..."
"You make it easier to be
Easier to be me
It's hard to believe
You make it easy
Easier to be
To be me..."
I always have the thinking that tomorrow always brings a better day. An easier day for challenges to be solved. Tomorrow always seems to be a brighter day than before because this means you've put your past behind you and moved on.
Tomorrow brings hope that things will change into what you want it to be. Whatever troubles bugging you seem to have evaporated the moment you open your eyes.
Tomorrow, for me, is going to be christened as Sleeping In Late Day, where I would be able to finally catch up on the sleep hours I've been missing. It's not a major problem. It's just that slightly more slumber hours would do a sleepy, yawning person good.
Of course, sleep has to be accompanied by a glass of HL Milk before climbing into bed and stuffing earphones into the ears that are filled with rich lullaby music that will swirl around in a cloud of poufy dreams.
Then, and only then can I ponder on what tomorrow brings.
What is the best thing about your friends?
~ Spice Girls - Wannabe
"Yo! I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want
So tell me what you want, what you really really want
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want
So tell me what you want, what you really really want
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really, really, really wanna zigazig-ha!!"
"If you wanna be my
You gotta get with my friends (Gotta get with my friends)
Make it last forever
Friendship never ends
If you wanna be my
You have got to give (You have got to give)
Taking is too easy But that's the way it is..."
I want, I want, I want...!! Nothing much. Just a good life, really. And no, I'm not a wannabe. Never wanted to be anybody but myself. Throughout the course of my life, my friends have always played an important role. All of them. Some have helped me to grow, some keep me grounded and some have the ability to make me just want to wring their sorry necks in exasperation.
I do wonder sometimes how I got to have friends like these. Of course, we can't all have perfectly behaved friends with all scruples intact. Some are sticklers for attitude while others are wayward and twisted in their thoughts.
So, I figure the best thing about my different groups of friends is how we managed to fit in with one another despite the times we've been tempted by Satan to kill each other. I know I have. The story of my friends would include how I met each individual and the craziest things I have influenced them to do.
Like stalking foreign males around the labs. Or taking redundant photographs of one another in the silliest places: the toilet that always seemed to have shit stuck onto the walls of AT LEAST two toilet bowls. Or making fun of the other classmates and labelling them as Decepticons. I have the strongest feeling that WE'RE the real Decepticons because we just refused to pay attention in class. Or encouraging each other online until 4am in the morning to force ourselves to complete an essay while still managing to endlessly surf PerezHilton.com and feast ourselves with gossip fodder.
Or having a spitting contest of Bubble Tea Pearls outside a shopping mall as we sit by a ledge. Or managing to get drunk on said Bubble Tea even though there was no alcohol whatsoever induced in said drink. Or talking to each other be it on MSN or on the phone until the wee hours. My apologies to those who have experienced the wrath of my mother while conversing with me at 4am in the morning.
Tragic I know, but we still survived, ehh??
So, slam your body down and zig-a-zag aaaaaaaaaaaah. 'Cuz friendship never ends.
What song best describes you?
~ Take 5 - I Give
"I've been waiting, all of my life
For the moment, I knew it was right
To make a promise
And give my heart away..."
"I give (my love)
My love (only to you)
I give my love forever I do
You win (you win)
My heart (my heart)
There's no holding back
No, really. I just clicked to the next track and this filled my ears. Thanks to Bunny, whom I harrassed to burn the CD and stuff the tracks into Optimus, I am now a raging Take 5 listener. I am also hoping to purchase their second album which came out in like, 2000. Yeah, fat chance I'm going to get my hands on that. It's practically an ancient album.
Hmmm, what can I say that best describes me.
With regards to the song, it's all in the lyrics, really. Here's the thing. Big heart, waiting to share that great capacity of love with someone and will wait for it, blah, blah, blah. I'm cheesey that way, but that's okay.
A couple of friends --including the sister-- have commented on how horny I am. Is that REALLY true?? I mean, come on. I just like looking at
And as much as some people love talking about themselves and how great their lives are, I feel just a tad uncomfortable in doing so. Therefore, let's just let the lyrics do the talking, ehh??
How is your life going?
~ Yellowcard - Fighting
"Said “I’m ok” but I know how to lie
I will never give up, no I’ll never give up..."
"What am I fighting for?
There must be something more
For all these words I sing
Do you feel anything?..."
Swell. I can't bring myself to say it sucks because it doesn't. Life has been good to me so far. I've been enjoying my life immensely because I am finally getting to do what I've always wanted AND I'm appreciating the full support I've been receiving.
It's birthday weekend galore because we're having almost one celebration per week for about four to five weeks or so. Pretty cool, if I do say so myself. I'm contented with life as it is right now. As far as I'm concerned, what more could I want??
Of course, sometimes the urge to give up or throw in the towel is still there. Like, giving up on studying for the dratted upcoming paper or giving up on some friendships that just doesn't really deserve the time and effort. Don't be surprised if you're one of those I finally eliminate out of my life whose nonsense I've had enough of.
Like as if you don't know I have an anally low tolerance level for People Who Are Nonsensical and Indulge In Unnecessary Rubbish Behavior. If you get my drift.
Although if you think about it, life would not be interesting without these idiots.
What song will play at your funeral?
~ 5ive - Until The Time Is Through
"Give me a moment before you go
There's something you ought to know..."
"Baby now and forever
Until the time is through (Until the time is through)
I'll be standing here
Waiting and never give up my faith in you (Give up my faith in you)
Trying to make it clear
Without your love, I'd be half a
Maybe one day you will understand
Now and forever
Until the time is through..."
Kwang kwang kwang. The irony is that this is one of my favorite songs. Therefore it should be befitting if this is being played in my rememberance. Yeah, sure. I'll still be standing here watching over you even when I'm dead and gone.
So, I'd advise you not to be alarmed if you feel a slight breeze brushing against your neck and all your fine hairs begin to prick up.
It's just my way of saying hello.
How does the world see you?
~ Ashley Parker Angel - Soundtrack To Your Life
"Your life is a flashback
A question, a photograph
A statement, a story, a struggle
A chance to laugh
'Cuz if you don't laugh you cry
A last crescendo when you die
So hit the rewind and listen
It's the playback
The soundtrack to your life..."
The world prolly sees me as a self-deprecator, a soul who never hesitates to see the funny side of life and would be so comfortable at making fun of herself. Intentionally or otherwise. It knows that despite that tough-as-nails exterior lies a soft gooey marshmallow centre just waiting to be discovered.
The world would say, hey, this one here's the real deal. This one doesn't do fake. Doesn't need fake. The world would then say, we could use a few more like her. Those who speak their minds and are unafraid to bitch and be bitched at. Prolly because she'll bitch right back.
Will you have a happy life?
~ Incubus - Drive
"Sometimes, I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear
And I can't help but ask myself how much I'll let the
Fear take the wheel and steer
It's driven me before, and it seems to have a vague, haunting mass appeal
But lately I am beginning to find that
I should be the one behind the wheel..."
"Whatever tomorrow brings
I'll be there with open arms and open eyes
Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there
I'll be there..."
"Would you choose water over wine...
Hold the wheel and drive??"
Seriously, how the heck would I know. I mean, I wish to. I want to. But doesn't everyone??
Will I get to spend my old age on the pristine, pearl beaches of the Florida Keys and finish my days scuba diving in Key Largo?? Will I be able to calmly sip on a mocktail while patting my back congratulating myself for making it this far as I lounge on a beach chair in the Bahamas?? Will there be a point in time where I look back and smile at my accomplishments as I watch the crimson blaze of the setting sun dipping under the horizon in Seychelles Island??
In any case, I would want to hold the wheel and drive to my awaiting destination, in hopes of reaching to a point where I can tell myself, I did it, good job; I made my mark in the world. And now it's time to die a happy woman.
What do your friends really think of you?
~ Toploader - Dancing In The Moonlight
"We like our fun and we never fight
You can't dance and stay uptight
It's a supernatural delight
Everybody was dancing in the moonlight..."
"Dancing in the moonlight
Everybody's feeling warm and bright
It's such a fine and natural sight
Everybody's dancing in the moonlight..."
Erm...they think I'm not uptight?? Like as if I got something stuck up my craw or as if I was born with a lemon in my mouth??
My friends think I'm crazy. Crazy enough to go dancing in the moonlight for no apparent reason and still feel it is the most normal thing in the world to do. They think I am this humongous ball of endless energy and comes up with the most whacked ideas just for the heck of it.
And of course, when you're dancing you can't be uptight at the same time right??
You'd look like a sorry asswipe and make an even bigger fool of yourself.
What song describes the person you're attracted to?
~ Backstreet Boys - Just To Be Close To You
That's how close I wanna be
To your heart baby (to your heart)
Like the stars to the night
And daytime is to light
We'll never part (we'll never part)
I want you to be
The only thing that I see
'Cause I believe it's our destiny..."
"Just to be close
Just to be close
It's the only thing
That I wanna do (that I wanna do)
Oooh, just to be close (close)
Just to be close
Just to be close to you (closer to you)
Just to be close..."
Really, I mean come on. Isn't all you wish for is that slight chance to be closer to the person you currently have your eye on?? Not all the time, just some days. On good days, you're okay but on others, you tend to feel that you really deserve to get closer to the fella.
It's that irresistable urge you can't seem to supress when you get a hormonal surge. What I usually do is to openly admire their physique within the confinements of my male friends' much taller heights and their much broader shoulders. I sneak a peek once, twice. Okay, MANY times.
Yeah, I can be waaaaaay subtle at times. Tact had never been one of my virtues. And I have been known to drag a friend or two along on my "mission" to "get close to" the poor chap. Just last night, I asked Rosz if he wanted to go stalk Macho Buff Guy with me and see where he & his cronies were headed.
Rosz gave me an undisguised look and replied, "What for?? I have no business with the guy."
Booooooo-ring.
This coming from a guy who perks up at the mere mention of "girl" and "friend", unabashedly inquiring politely if they were hot. He never bothered to ask if they were single.
Anywayz, I thought it would have been rather fun to shadow Macho Buff Guy especially at night. I've never tried the sport at night. Rather exciting, don't you think?? Kinda like during FYP and my time during Polytechnic but BETTER.
Hey, come on. Everyone needs a hobby every now and then.
And besides, these guys were definitely professionals, judging from their appearances. Would I get caught if I had a stakeout that included them, do you think??
It would've been worth it.
What message would you like to tell the next generation?
~ Lee Ryan - Army Of Lovers
"There's an army of lovers dying to meet you
Dying to make your acquaintance
It could be you or it could be me
So don't let go
Because I need you so..."
"Accidents happen strangest of places
How come they happen at all
Look for the turning for something or nothing
I won't let go because I need you so..."
You mean the next of MY generation or the ones in general?? If it were the generation of my own that is, being my own spawn, I would tell them 3 things:
Never forget your religion. This is of utmost important and I wouldn't be stressing it if it weren't. The fact that our race is tied hand in hand with our religion expresses how the way we were raised from young. So, that is the number one priority.
Never forget your roots or where you come from. You might have been poor at the beginning of your life but rose up the ranks to obtain money and power. But remembering where you started off is important because it helps to keep one grounded.
Count your blessings every night. Goes together with not forgetting one's religion, I suppose. Every religion has their form of prayers so in a way, counting one's blessings is somewhat part of praying.
Now, if these people weren't in any way connected to me I'd be saying: Go ahead and do whatever you want. Ruin yourselves into oblivion, I don't care.
After all, I won't be here to see the mass destruction caused by the time this happens, right??
Do you have a deep dark secret?
~ Fall Out Boy - The Take Over, The Break's Over
"Baby, seasons change but people don't
And I'll always be waiting in the back room
I'm boring but overcompensate with
Headlines and flash, flash, flash photography..."
"Wouldn't you rather be a widow than a divorcee?
Style your wake for fashion magazines
Widow or a divorcee?
Don't pretend, d-d-d-don't pretend..."
"We do it in the dark with smiles on our faces
We're dropped and well concealed in secret places, woah
We do it in the dark with smiles on our faces
We're dropped and well concealed in secret places
We don't fight fair..."
My deep dark secret is that I do it in the dark with a smile on my face. Like Patrick Stump. No secret lahh, no secret!!
Orthodoxically, I'm pretty much an open book although I do have a few private facts that are only shared with either the people from The Old Gang or the ones from GB. And these aren't even the same facts. For example, a secret known by GB isn't necessarily known by The Old Gang.
Of course, they're all real secrets, okay. And as much as people think they know me so well, I'd like to think I still have the upper-hand and prove them wrong from time to time.
Like for example my --wait, wait. Isn't this supposed to be a deep dark secret?? The hell I'm going to reveal myself!! Go away!!
What will I feel/think the moment I wake up tomorrow morning?
~ Good Charlotte - Face The Strange
"Lately I've been feeling low
I've been feeling alone the things I used to be
I miss the things I used to see
I need something again
My oldest friends these cigarettes can't cure
It just ain't what I'm looking for..."
"I think it's time to use this company I keep
The company I keep don't keep me company?
And all my dreams are right out there in front of me
It's sounding like the deepest darkest part of me..."
Gawd, I NEED to get this last paper over and done with, man!! And as much as I'd like to dawdle and fawn over the fact that one semester of University studies is over, I don't have the time nor patience to do so.
I actually feel like crying because instead of poring over my notes and slides I am doing this blog game!! It's not like anybody twisted my arm into doing it or anything. Yeah, I need to face the fact that procrastination is my personal hobby. I am notorious for it. It can also be my middle name.
Another thought entering my mind the next day would be, shit. I really, really lost everything on Dean. My pictures folders that had Channing, Orlando, Jensen and Michael. My soccer folders that contained memories of mostly Ruud, David and Xabi.
*gasps* My SHIRTLESS HUNKS!! I had jsut one teeny tiny folder dedicated to them.
My school assignments I spent almost night after night racking my brain. Other documents like past conversations I had. Including my beloved chapters.
Its like all these personal belongings of mine went up in technological flames.
I could scream into my pillow if I wanted to. But I'm not going to. Because I am a strong female and I don't succumb to such weaknesses.
My heart aches and breaks for my loss.
What will be my recurrant thought/mood over the next weekend?
~ Boys Like Girls - Five Minutes To Midnight
"I've got a sickness, you've got the cure
You've got the spark I've been lookin' for
And I've got a plan, we walk out the door..."
"Turn it up
It's five minutes to midnight
You're coming home with me tonight
I can't get enough
Shakin' me up
Turn it up all right
At five minutes to midnight
You see our name in city lights
We'll make the clock stop
Make your heart drop and come alive..."
Oh, so we've finally come to the end of the game?? Ohh, thank GOD!! I thought we'd never finish!!
Right now, I can't bring myself to think about the weekend or the next. Not until I finish my paper.
But I will say this, though. MY BIRTHDAY'S COMING, MY BIRTHDAY'S COMING, MY BIRTHDAY'S COMING!!
Owell. It's just another strike off the notch on my bedpost to mark yet another passing year. Seriously, I'm not going to have a party. Nope, not at all. I have been pestered to do so but I just don't see the point.
I didn't see it then and I don't see it now. Can't I do it when I'm like, 25 or something?? When I've reached the quarter-of-a-century mark??
Not that I don't like parties. I love them to bits and pieces. I just think a party for me, specifically, doesn't sound so feasible. And besides, it's already to late to call for a party now. Party for one?? Yeah, sure!! That could be arranged.
Laterz...
Lenny
3 comments:
*yawns* ah it's over? heh, forgot what i wanted to say. hehehe JUST KIDDING!
btw, how come elliot yamin looks so ugly?! like came out of jail or something! opps =X
Lmao! Me reading your blog today, and you blogging on something right off my blog today! Hehehe. Coincidences or what?? That was done so many light years ago and where were you all these while brother??
Take care and best of luck for your exams!
to daphne:
Yeah I KNOOOOOW!! He's like the shaggiest person I've seen!! You'd think he couldn't even afford a haircut!! Guh...
to xue:
OMG!! You serious?? Hey, man remember we don't believe in coincidences. And yeah, I've been like so tied up I've had no ME or Xabi time in a looooooong while. Don't worry...I'll drop by soon, aitez. ;)
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