Long Time No Blog...

I have the urge to go on a rant here. Especially since I haven't posted up anything since I got home from my short trip to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. Because everytime I think about posting something down, I think twice & start to get lazy about seeing it get done.

Hmmm...let's see, let's see. Okay, two whole days filled with much shopping, although on the afternoon we arrived, my uncle brought us to this wholesale centre in Nilai made up of shops the size of a building. It's like, one shop is equivalent to the size of one building and the shop is within that one building. And the only means of travelling through the shops is by car. That's how big the place was. It was a virtual Hicksville, like some oasis in the middle of nowhere and there wasn't much that appealed to us.

That itself, took half a day & it wasn't as if we completed the whole route.

Ohh and before that, there was an incident at my aunt's place. My aunt & uncle had invited the whole lot of us to bunk over at his condo since we were only spending like, one night there & the only kids left there was their youngest daughter. The morning we arrived all bleary-eyed & car-lagged, rooms were delegated per family. Meaning, there were altogether three families in that condo; mine, the residing aunt's & another aunt's family of five that included my grandmother & her maid.

Still following??

Anywayz, my cousin had invited my three sisters to the condo's in-house shop to buy some groceries & when they returned, each sister had purchased a packet of Cadbury's Chochettes & laid them out on the dining table to bring along later on the trip to Nilai.

As we were about to go out of the house, my sister Adlyn noticed that her packet of chocolates had gone missing from where it was supposed to be. And so it was that the case of the missing chocolates promptly made my sister burst into tears. Because Adlyn is the what's-mine-is-mine kind of person & out of all the chocolates that HAD to disappear, it was hers. The house became a momentary pandemonium as my mother frantically searched for the chocolates & interrogated each one of us, thinking we'd pull a prank on Adlyn.

In the end, someone very unexpected half-owned up. And that was my grandmother. Ostensibly, it was HER who took the chocolates from the table, thinking that my aunt had placed them there for everyone & anyone to grab. But the ornerous old lady didn't exactly admit that she took them. Instead, she placed the blame on her maid, citing that ohh, maybe it was the maid who ACCIDENTALLY took it.

And of course, when the maid checked her bag, the packet was there!! Sure, my grandmother pointed her finger at her maid but reliable sources confirmed that it was indeed my grandmother who requested for her maid to put those chocolates in her bag. So that she could munch on them in the car. Like, what the heck!! Crazy old coot.

She tried to give them back to Adlyn, who was still sniffing & sobbing, but my sister was already in merajok mode & was best left alone.

And what of the chocolates, you might ask?? They were still at the bottom of the maid's bag, in one melted heap & uneaten. In the end, my grandmother totally forgot about them. And of course, the maid was tormented mercilessly by my two crackerjack joker aunts who would bring up the subject of her being the culprit of the stolen chocolates every fifteen minutes or so. The maid just couldn't shy away from the utter embarrassment my grandmother had caused her.

Though we didn't find anything fit for purchasing at Nilai, it was a whole new level once we got to the night market at Petaling Street. It was kinda like the Bugis Village of Singapore but bigger, much more variety & most definitely, very much cheaper. Everyone of us got for ourselves new sneakers; yes, that's right. All SEVEN of us. Well, my Dad was the only one who bought three pairs. And probably a couple more the next day. This coming from a man who'd normally rather not shop. But then again, his Nikes got stolen so I guess you could say he was on a personal vendetta for shoes.

My sister & I had new pairs of Nike Airs while the other opted for Puma & adidas. The most difficult shoes to look for was Nini's. I mean, seriously, just how many stalls do you think sold adidas for kids?? But turned out that Dad had taken the wrong route while looking for Nini's shoes & ended up going into the lane that strictly sold adult sizes only. The second hardest person to look for shoes was me. I just couldn't find anything that grabbed my attention with that individual uniqueness that I was looking out for.

Like for example, the last time I was here, my pink Timberland boots had practically screamed out for me to grab them. And you know how I absolutely abhor it when I see someone on the street wearing the same clothes or shoes as me. Needless to say, until now I've not yet seen anyone who wears the same pink boots as me. Hah!!

By the way, did I mention that the place was an Ang Moh haven?? Oh, Mon Dieu!! Turn right, handsome white guy; turn left, another handsome white guy; turn behind, yet another handsome white guy!! Every five minutes or so, I'd find myself making eye contact with my sister or vice versa & speak in half-code. "Five o'clock!!" or "Red shirt, red shirt!!"

And and and!! There were two white guys who were wearing the exact color combination that me & my sister were wearing!! Oooh, la la!! *faints*

My cousin, who is as boycrazy as I was neglected to come along because the other two families were tired out from the afternoon in Nilai & also because they didn't need to buy anything from Petaling Street. When we arrived home later that night & bragged gleefully about seeing all those lovely eyecadies, she promptly bemoaned about the misfortune of not coming along with us.

*grins from ear to ear*

Well, we did actually attract a miniscule amount of attention. From Mom. Who endlessly asked me who I was looking at while we were trying on T-shirts at one stall. Which of course, prompted me to reply glibly that I thought I saw a nice-looking T-shirt but was mistaken. My sister beside me never failed to cover her snickers until I oh-so-accidentally shoved an elbow into her abdomen.

We returned home half-happy; there were still items that we hadn't acquired for ourselves. I was in dire need of bottoms. As in, cargoes, pants & those two-legged thingies. And on the way home along the highway, I spotted a magnificent billboard in front of this mall with *screams!!* Ruud van Nistelrooy plastered all over it wearing the new Dutch World Cup Kit!!! *screams again!!* My horse!!

So the next day, my aunt brought us to a nearby mall called One Utama -the very same mall of which had the Ruud of yesterday splashed across the same billboard. Which to me, is pretty redundant because utama is Malay is actually one, or first. So it's like, One First?? Or One One?? Bahh, these next-door-across-the-causeway neighbors.

Only that the mall wasn't really a mall. Picture a staidum. Like say, Old Trafford. Okay, maybe not as gargantuan as Old Trafford; slightly smaller. Like say, ummm...ahh, okay, Stamford Bridge. So, it's like Stamford Bridge with 5 floors up. No joke. And it boasts over 5000 carpark spaces to boot.

The best thing of all?? RM1 for 6 hours of shopping galore!! Beat that, all you expensive Singapore shopping centres!!

If you can't imagine how big Stamford Bridge is, then picture yourself going around the mall until your feet hurt so bad that you feel like hacking them off yourself. And then, comes this buggy service like those on a golf course that will gladly ferry you around to whatever shop you might want to go. For free. It's got a Giant hypermarket inside as well as the local Malaysian corporation Jusco, which if I do say so myself, is already pretty much a mall by itself. It's like Isetan or Metro or John Little with 5 floors, including an extensive bakery & mini snack eateries covering one floor.

My aunt said one day wasn't enough to cover the whole place. She did it in a week. My aunt's not really rich or anything; her condo was paid for by my uncle's company since it was the company's responsibility after uprooting them from their homeland. My uncle's company used to have a corporation in Singapore until they shifter to Kuala Lumpur & so, to get their fellow employees to stay on, they had to sponsor for every family & its family members.

My cousins' education are being paid for, which was why they opted to attend KL's Australian International School & later on, Shatec. My aunt herself is a homemaker; one who supposedly rubs elbows with KL's elite. Because the area where they live are reknowned for the upper-crust of KL society -kinda like New York's Upper East Side- the people my aunt has to mingle with are the famous Datins, wives of the Malaysian Datuks.

She says that every week or so, she'll be invited into their multimillion dollar homes for tea & an Elite Ladies' Club meeting, which is actually a session of endless gossiping while the Datins will pour out their problems to her. Which she would gladly listen; what else could she do?? She told me an example of how one Datin complained to her that the monthly allowance of RM35, 000 given by her husband was not enough.

Are your eyes bulging?? That's right. RM35, 000 isn't enough to last a month. Or was it a week?? Either way, 35K ain't paper money you burn during the Hungry Ghost Festival.

Anywayz, to prevent myself from digressing, we eventually managed to get everything we needed -like, FINALLY!!- and thus, covering one level. I even got myself a pair of jeans!! *claps hands gleefully* And you think, but I don't EVER wear jeans. I know!! Because I never found a pair that fit my plus-sized derriere & the hell am I gonna fork out so much money on the jeans in Singapore!!

And so it was that the entire family came & got what they wanted...or not really. I STILL want a Holland T-shirt or jersey!! We're one-quarter Dutch, Goddammit!!

The only consolation of Dutch World Cup memorabilia that I had to make do with was my brand new Holland lanyard, a gift from Punani after he came back from his Brokeback Mountain Europe trip with Ivan, which I had delightfully swung around as if I was on a Rodeo circuit when Arjen Robben scored the winner against Serbia and Montenegro in Group C's opening match.

I had nearly wept with joy when Punani presented it to me while we were having dinner after the GB Family took to the movies to watch X-Men 3: The Last Stand. It was our first full GB Family outing since Punani went on his trip two months ago. Yesssarh, the GB Family is back in business!!

Ohh yeah, and before watching the movie, I had a made a switch from becoming Angel to Storm, or Stomp, depending on how you view it. GB Family insists that I am Stomp, in recognition of my notorious pink boots but really, I beg to differ.

But the after the movie, Colossus is my hero!!

*Sighs dreamily a la Fleur Delacour in Harry Potter & The Goblet Of Fire*

I am still Storm-slash-Stomp, though. Penese is Hugh Jackman's blade-toting Wolverine while Blome is the now-dead-and-resting-in-peace Dark Phoenix a.k.a the bitch who killed my Professor X. Grrr...Kity is the oh-so-intelligently-intellectual Beast minus the bitchy attitude and Chippy is...well, he actually claims to be that cool dude Iceman but we all agree he was fit to be, erm...Jugernaut. Punani is...what is Punani's character, anywayz?? He could be Colossus or the also-dead-it's-all-HER-fault Cyclops. And Annie suits Shadowcat's character well enough, I suppose. Either way, we all have a personified character from the comic & can finally heave a sigh of relief that, FINALLY, we've watched it.

Laterz...

Lenny Chubby Dean GodGilla Xabs