Birthday wishes STILL coming in, though it's the end of August, but nonetheless, very much appreciated.

Thanks to Ester, Marta & Alex for that fantastic wallpaper. The Old Gang, whom I met up with yesterday for dinner & coffee: Fala, Nini, Mardiyah & Nur. You guys know me too well; you got me ANOTHER orange bag, the same color as what the GB Family bought for me. Ahahahkz!! But thanks, anywayz. I really enjoyed last night, even though we had an unexpected 'guest' with us; thank God you didn't sabotage me or anything!! Yeah, the noodles were horrible; don't think I'll buy food at that stall again. I had no appetite to finish whatever there was left.

After-dinner coffee & biscotti at Starbucks was great as well. 3 drinks shared by 5 people: Chocolate Frappuccino, Raspberry Frappuccino & Strawberries & Cream.Yum yum. And the biscotti, though delicious, was like a brick; if it got any harder, I think we'd all break our teeth. Ahahahakz!! It's good to able to catch up with each other; I've really missed you guys ALOT!!

International matches coming up in the next two weeks or so. A break from the Premiership, Primera Liga, Serie A and yada, yada, yada. Should be interesting, considering some of the matches. Now that the season has kicked in, countries won't be playing friendlies anymore. Each country would be battling it's heart out for a place in the upcoming World Cup '06 in Germany. With a year to go in preparations, it isn't a wonder why everyone is set to improve himself by getting into regular first team basis & why ex-internationals are returning to play for their country in hopes to bring home the prestigeous World Cup trophy.

National squads were announced just a few days ago, with some players being axed by their coaches in replacement of newbies, some of whom are probably experiencing their first-ever international call-up. It's always an honor to play for your country, especially in a grand tournament such as this where everyone wants to get their hands on the goodies.

And furthermore, with the transfer window closing in just a few hours, club managers are rushing over wanted players, accepting or rejecting transfer proposal fees; even the players themselves are caught up in the action. A good example would be the very, very recent signing of Michael Owen. Owen, who's been grabbing headlines quite often these days have finally settled with the prospect of coming home to England once again. Though now, it's not Anfield, but at St. James Park. The 25-year old striker has agreed on a 4-year contract with Newcastle United in an estimated sum of 17 million pounds; a record transfer fee for the Magpies since the signing of veteran & former England international, Alan Shearer.

Now that ex-Galactico Owen is donning the number 10 jersey, Magpies boss Graeme Souness believes he will do great things for the club who's not won the league title since 1927. Owen should be happy as he'd be able to play in the regular first team & not worry about going through the pecking order like he did back in Madrid and thus, boosting his chances of being chosen by Sven Goran Eriksson to participate in the World Cup.

And by the way, this isn't by ESPNSoccer.com. Although the information were from there, I just typed whatever I knew & read in my own words. So, no italics for this one.

The Kop Faithful should be dealing with a disappointing blow, though the same can't be said for those whom support Newcastle. Well, as long as Owen's happy even though Liverpool was his first choice. Should be an interesting match, Liverpool & Newcastle. Would Rafa ever rue the day he didn't take Owen back?? Or would leaving Liverpool in the first place come back to haunt Owen?? I mean, right after Owen left, Liverpool were the Champions of Europe. And ironically, not being able to play in Europe was the reason why Owen packed his bags in the first place.

And Real Madrid are getting more & more ridiculous by buying more strikers. It's not as if they're lacking in their attacking options. They've got brilliant goalscorers, some of whom aren't even playing the forward roles. And now they want a left-back. Unbelieveable.

International world-famous Italian referee Pierluigi Collina has decided to hang up his whistle after the Italian Football Federation had accused him of a conflict of interest just because he shared the same sponsors as Italian giants AC Milan. The 45-year old decided to quit, claiming that there was no trust given as his credibility was cast into doubt, but now it seems the Italian Association of Referees has rejected his resignation letter. Like duhh, you've already accused him, you think he's just going to sit there & be the object of more speculation?? Of course he's going to quit!!

FYI, Collina is famous for his distinct bald head & eye-popping glares, which kinda makes him look a little like Gollum from Lord Of The Rings. Usually, 45 is the orthodox age for referees to call it quits, but the Italian Football Federation has made Collina a special case in recognition of his talents of good judgement & accurate decisions. And like duhh, he's not bias unlike some referees. It's kinda ridiculous, if you ask me about it. Like, hello?? He's a world-class professional; he's reffed numerous high-profile matches, including the 2002 World Cup final between Germany & Brazil & the 1999 Champions League final between Bayern Munich & Manchester United.

Frankly, I don't see what's really the big deal just because a match offical gets the same sponsorship with one of the teams from the same league. According to sources, the referees in England are sponsored by the same one sponsoring Chelsea. But so far, that hasn't been an obstacle in the game of football. So why should it be so now?? Seriously, losing Collina as a referee would definitely be a great loss to the world of football. It's like the Pope to the world when he died. Okay, maybe not so dramtic as THAT, but you get my drift.

Hell, the guy was voted World Referee of the Year FIVE TIMES, his book, The Rules Of The Game is a best-seller & he's got like, 28 years of experience as a referee. And his sheet is as clean as a whistle. Well, not HIS whistle. Apparently now, offers from the England & Qatar have come up, willing to provide a place for the world's best ref. Collina, why don't you just come to Singapore & join the S-League, okay?? Ahahahakz!! Imagine that.

Okay, now back to my world.

I'm miserable here. I feel like I'm half-dead over my feet. I never imagined working 9am-6pm everyday in an office would be like this but I never imagined it to take its toll on me, either. It's not about the place or the environment or the people that affects me. It's the whole situation in general. I don't like working here. I don't like doing the things that I'm required to do, not because I'm lazy or anything. I don't like doing the same thing, day in, day out; sitting in front of the computer screen feeling like I'm wasting my days.

Basically because I can't see myself doing this for the rest of my life & I don't even WANT to see myself doing this. It's not in me. I despise being enclosed by 4 wall panels; I feel caged. I don't feel the sense of satisfaction at the end of the day even though I know I've done a good job or I've finished everything & met its deadline. It's weird because I dread coming to work every morning. Not because I dread whatever work that will be given, but because I'm not enjoying it.

First of all, I'm not ready to go out into the working world & make a living for myself; I still want to study because I want to persue a different career path. This was never what I wanted in the first place, I got it because MOE gave it to me.

If I could do another semester of FYP in replacement of my attachment, I would gladly do it again. With OR without those silly Fries. Because I enjoyed myself then, even though the normal stress period comes & I'd get frustrated over my silly project. But nothing beats having to do what you don't enjoy doing. It's just pure depression. Even if my company paid me the highest salary they could just so I could come back & work for them, I wouldn't take it.

What's the use of working on something that just doesn't sit with you, that doesn't match your personality or isn't what you've always wanted?? I just can't stand being cooped inside a room all day doing web edits. I don't get anything out of it, I don't benefit anything, the computer sure as hell doesn't benefit from anything either!!

It's different than say, teaching a music-illiterate kid how to play Hot Cross Buns on the keyboard. At the end of the day, you can say "Well done!!" to him because he's able to play it & you can see joy & happiness on not only his face, but on his parents' faces as well because their son is able to play. I'd feel a sense of achievement & I can say, "Yes, now he can play. Because I taught him to. I did this, this, this & we're all happy. My work has paid off."

You can't say that to a PC, can you?? Even though the comp successfully uploads stuff that you've tried to but failed so many times before. Hell, it's the PC's job to upload!! So in the end, you don't feel as if you've achieved something.

I know it's almost impossible to find that perfect job for yourself, but the most important thing is to be able to like it. I mean, that's what I feel. Firstly, know what you want to do. Then go about obtaining it. Well, for me, I've got quite a long way to go. True, sometimes what you want isn't what you're going to get; but I think if it fits the bill close enough, it's fine. And sometimes, what you got backfires on you. But, that's life. I'm willing to try really damn hard to get where I possibly can just so I won't have to see myself suffer in the long run doing something I don't enjoy & regretting what should or shouldn't have done. It'll be difficult, I know.

Some may say, if that's the case then why work at all?? Get hitched & go raise children lahh!!

*Glares*

Sorry, but no. I'd rather get myself a stable income first & overcome any problems than to start a family at a young age & cause more problems. And furthermore, why would I want to succumb to an early life filled with endless commitments when I can have a single life where the world is at my doorstep?? Now is the time to dig the singlehood status. I still have many things I want to see, many places I want to go & many things I want to do, okay?? When I finally get married, settle down & have children, I want to be able to say to them, "Hah!! Been there, done that!! Your turn will come." Just like how my parents did.

I don't understand what's the deal with the rising number of early marriages these days. Especially among my community. I'm sorry, but I have to ask this question because it really baffles me. Did the age for menopause drop down or something?? Like from the age of 55 it suddenly shot down to say, 15?? Is that why nowadays everyone has producing babies like rabbits at such a young age?? Rushing off to produce so that the human race would not be depleted from the face of the Earth. And here I thought the line, "First comes marriage, then the baby carriage" still existed. But now it's reversed. It's, "First the baby carriage, then MAYBE marriage but after that, divorce." And more AIDS. It's like a chain reaction. Well, pardon me for being traditional. And pardon me for abiding the laws of our religion. I'm nowhere near holy or saintly, but at least I know that's one rule that'd I'd never break.

Sad, innit??

*Shakes head* Unbelievable.

Laterz...
Lenny JC